Do you feel overwhelmed with all the things you feel you need to do on your recovery journey?
This has been coming up A LOT this week with a handful of our clients. They are SO ready to recover, that they’re diving in head-first with our recovery programs - wanting to implement all the things, like yesterday ;).
Or some are having a few great days and then back down again. They are annoyed, confused and discouraged!!
If you can relate, read on because today I’m going to give you some tips and tricks so you don’t get trapped in the mentality that you have to DO so much, all at once. Let’s keep you out of a state of overwhelm and moving forwards, not back. Sound good?
**With that said, I am proud of each of you for all the efforts you are making. However, I do want to indicate something VERY important, so you can actually recover.**
For many of us, over-doing is what got us here (in adrenal fatigue or related) in the first place. You’re most likely REALLY GOOD at doing a LOT, am I right? (my hand is up).
The universe is screaming loud and clear to me, as a coach, telling me this is the perfect topic for today.
(By the way, something I STILL have to remind myself of every day)
Is it WHAT we do, or HOW we do it?
Or as Lou Holtz and Lena Horne put it….It’s not the load that breaks you down, it’s the way you carry it.
It’s a good topic to bring to the table. I don’t know the answer for you, but for me it’s been a little of both.
If what you’re doing right now isn’t working for you and your body - consider these….
7 TIPS TO NOT GO BACKWARDS IN YOUR ADRENAL RECOVERY
(Let's focus on the HOW we do things, as well as the WHAT, shall we?) #7 is the most important, so don’t miss it!
#1 DO THE DANG THING… BUT TAKE IT DOWN A FEW NOTCHES!
When you’re doing all the things, are you rushing? Do you feel you’re always racing against the clock? What if you still did all the things that you feel you NEEDED to do every day, but you slowed it WAY down? How would that contribute to your body?
If you’re guilty, like me of rushing even when you don’t need to, practice these 3 things: 1) ask yourself when you’re feeling rushed“do I need to be rushing?” most often I find that I don’t need to be. 2) Take a deep breath 3) Ground through your feet.
Start practicing moving slower? Like literally walk slower, brush your teeth slower…What if you did the dishes with more attention and focus, just being in the moment?
What if slowing down is exactly what your body, God or the universe has been suggesting all this time?
What if you did less not because you are bedridden, burnt-out and had no other choice, but from a place of, I’m gonna nurture myself and rest because that’s what my body requires today?
What if slowing down is what’s required for your body to heal? What if doing things that nurtured you was the medicine you required most?
What did that feel like when you read it? Did you tingle? Cool! Was a weight lifted? Awesome!
Did it frankly, piss you off? Okay, good ;)
#2 INCLUDE YOU IN YOUR TO-DO LIST
If you’re like me, you love to-do lists. So, get in the habit of adding AT LEAST one nurturing activity to your to-do list EVERY SINGLE DAY. For example, a bath a walk in nature, a foot massage, listening to music, going to a coffee shop and reading a book.
Sometimes this is hard for people, so here’s a quick exercise. Write down a list of 5 things you would do if you had an entire day to yourself, no obligations, no dishes, no errands, no kids, no dogs, no partner. It might be harder than you think, but if you do it you might be surprised what comes up. Put it on your fridge and start adding those things to your to-do list.
3. COMMIT TO HAVING MORE FUN WITH WHAT YOU’RE DOING (THE HOW)!
Isn’t life supposed to be fun!!! What would it take to have more fun in YOUR life each day? Commit to having more fun with all the things. And only do things if they feel LIGHT or it BRING YOU JOY. Or make it fun so it DOES bring you joy.
Put your favorite music on when you’re working around the house or commuting. Listen to peaceful music, a meditation or a motivational speaker when you’re doing things that normally bring you stress.
You can ask yourself right when you wake up…What would it take for me to have more fun today?
4. SCHEDULE PERSONAL CHECK-INS THROUGH OUT THE DAY
When you have a day full of things to do, commit to listening to your body. Schedule in breaks using reminders/alarms on your phone. This way you can check in with yourself and listen to the warning signs of pushing yourself too far, before it’s too late. Avoid the crash or taking 2 steps back.
5. GIVE YOUR BODY A RECOVERY DAY
How often do you give yourself a recovery day? Especially after a big day? What if you planned ahead a bit more and when you knew you were going to have a big day, make the next day a YOU day and more importantly don’t have any judgement about it. Enjoy it! Yes, you might feel tired, but that’s okay. Fill it with things that nourish and nurture you.
6. GET BETTER AT SAYING NO
If you have a hard time saying no or asking for what you want or need from a co-worker, boss, partner, child, this is one of my favorite lines. “Sorry that doesn’t work for me.” You can say this many ways, but if you say it calmly and in a way that honors you and the other person, it should go over fairly well.
#7 DO THE DANG THING…BUT CHANGE YOUR ATTITUDE (MOST IMPORTANT)
It’s easy for us to be on autopilot, just go through the motions each day, thinking the same thoughts as we did the day before, repeating the same habits and expecting a different result. But as Einstein says, that’s the definition of insanity!
When you are doing all the things, what’s your mentality? Are you resentful, angry? Are you trying to prove something? If so, notice that and practice changing it.
Most of us who suffer from adrenal fatigue feel like we need to do it all and do it well to feel worthy. And most often HOW we’re doing things, our attitude is what’s breaking us down.
SO I HAVE TO FAKE IT?
When I talk about shifting mindset, what often comes up for people is that they feel like they’re faking it when they try to shift their thoughts. Yes, the common affirmation such as “I’m happy, life is so good!” doesn’t work for most.
It’s not about faking it and pretending you’re happy. Instead it’s about bringing your attention to something you CAN be happy about. See the difference?
Your bed, your partner, your dog, the grass, the weather….whatever you can find OR
Or ask a question that gets you out of your current funk.
Ask a question that creates a new possibility and gets you out of the conclusion that you’ve made. For example: “what would it take for me to have more awareness of what my body is trying to tell me here.” or “Body what do you require to have more ease or more energy...?”
In case you’re new to me, here are my key steps to mindset shifting… When you find yourself thinking negative thoughts about life, your body, your symptoms:
1) Acknowledge it, staying out of judgment
2) Honor it by saying “Okay, I’m feeling ______!”
3) Make a choice either to stay in it or get out of it (you always have a choice)
4) If you want to get OUT of it… Then do the above, think of something to be happy about or something you’re grateful for or ask a question
It works, if you try it. You know why I know it works, because I’m human just like you and I too have things that challenge me, in my body, as a parent, my job, my finances. And, I’ve tried many of the healing modalities out there, from yoga, to meditation, to tapping, to reiki, to acupuncture, you name it I’ve tried it, I guarantee. And I’ve been using these techniques with my clients for years and I know what works.
But it only works if….
***YOU PRACTICE IT (COMMIT TO IT)
***YOU’RE OPEN TO IT WORKING
***YOU’RE ACTUALLY READY TO CHANGE (are you okay with changing a bit of who you are currently).
WARNING: Brutal honesty moment.. Even though we say we want to change, deep down many of us don’t because somehow what we’ve created is working for us. It’s serving us or served a need in the past. And changing takes work, it takes stepping up. It takes courage. It’s takes being a bit different than maybe people around you. Are you used to complaining. Is everyone around you doing the same thing? Faking their happiness going through the motions? What if you’ve done that (yes, me for decades) and you’re ready to change that about yourself. It’s okay you can change it. Everyday is a new day. We weren’t meant to be so stagnant as human beings. Let’s evolve. We are supposed to grow and change! Don’t be afraid of it!
So, I’m curious are you actually ready to change your mind, your attitude? like, really? If yes, awesome. If not, that’s totally cool too…. At least now you know.
If you’re super pissed off or annoyed, I get it. I’m a coach, coaches don’t help people create change and heal by being nice ;)
So, remembers IT’S NOT THE LOAD THAT BREAKS YOU, BUT HOW YOU CARRY IT.
Are you feeling you could change your HOW? If so, what does that look like?